If you can’t already tell by the title, I don’t think eating 6 meals a day is awesome. But before I get into any more detail, I want to share a story.
Okay, so this is what happened to me yesterday:
– I decided to go to the Los Angeles zoo.
– While I was petting one of the baby pigs there, a group of 100 tigers broke out of their cages.
– The tigers started to eat everyone, so I rode the baby pig to the popcorn stand and found a pair of nunchucks inside.
– I defended myself using the nunchucks while on pigback and came face to face with the king tiger.
– The king tiger said “Keith…. I’m sorry but the other tigers and I only ate 5 meals today. If we don’t eat you guys within the next hour, then we will starve, our metabolisms will slow down, and we will become fat. You are my sixth meal.”
– So what did I do? I did what any other smart person would do if they were threatened by a hungry talking tiger who’s name isn’t Tony: I set the baby pig free and engaged in a 30 minute 1-on-1 battle with the king tiger.
– 30 minutes have passed and I have lost 4 toes and an arm. As the tiger was about to finish me off, thousands of US Special Forces soldiers parachuted into the zoo and killed all the rampaging tigers.
– Then I woke up.
Yeah… it was all a dream, boo hoo.