Prison Workout Routine – Get Ripped Like A Convict

March 25, 2014 | 52 Comments


When I think of prisons, the first things that come to mind are:

  1. Rape jokes
  2. Dudes stabbing dudes
  3. Rape jokes
  4. Ridiculously ripped guys doing push ups in their cells

Now whether or not it’s actually true, Hollywood brainwashed us into thinking that dudes in prison are super ripped and muscular.

Personally, I have never been to prison, nor do I know anyone in prison, but whether you like it or not, most people believe that most guys in prison are totally jacked.

Prison workout routine

How to do a prison workout routine

So hypothetically speaking, let’s just say I was arrested and put into prison for bringing beef jerky into a vegan restaurant (hey, it happens).**

How in the hell would I then continue to workout even though I’m in a locked in a tiny cell all day?

The answer – bodyweight exercises.

Using bodyweight exercises to get ripped

If you don’t have access to weights, then bodyweight exercises are the next best thing.

And please don’t think bodyweight exercises only encompasses the stereotypical “dude in cell” doing push ups. When it comes to bodyweight exercises, there are hundreds of potential exercises that you can do.

This is why you really have no excuse to get fit even if you don’t have access to the gym. If a prisoner in a tiny cell can get ripped, then so can you.

Prison workout – upper body exercises

Push up variatons – while the old fashioned regular push up is still one of the best upper body exercises around, there’s just so much more you can do with it. And the best part about push ups is that you only need a tiny bit of open floor space.

Push up variations include:

Tricep dips – If you want to look like a force to be reckoned with in prison, then you need to have big arms. One of the best ways to build up your arms is with tricep dips. These can be done on the side of your bed.

Pull ups– These might be a bit harder to do in a prison cell since there’s most cells don’t include a pull up bar, so the best thing to do would be to find a ledge or something to grab onto. Pull ups are an excellent exercise for building a wide v-shaped back.

Prison workout – lower body exercises

Squat variations – In the world of bodyweight exercises, bodyweight squats are the lower body equivalent of push ups. And just like push ups, there are a ton of squat variations including:

Lunge variations – Lunges are another great exercise to build lower body power and mass. Here are some of the most popular lunge variations:

Prison workout – ab exercises

Front plank/side plank – These are 2 of the best exercises to streghten your core. While the side plank works similar muscles as front plank, it focuses on the obliques a bit more.

Mountain climbers – This is a great exercise to really work your abs. Try to do these for 30-60 seconds at a time. You can check out the video here for a demonstration.

Lying leg raises – These are great if you tend to have small ab muscles.. Lying leg raises are great for building up the size of your abs.

Badass exercises- become the ultimate convict

These are exercises that will make you the most badass man in prison (and outside prison). Seriously, if you can pull off these exercises with perfect form, no one will mess with you.

They include:

  • One-arm push ups
  • One-leg squats
  • One-arm pull ups
  • Hanging straight leg raises
  • Stand to Stand Bridges
  • One-arm handstand push ups

These are all super advanced exercises, but Coach Paul Wade teaches them to you in a way that even beginners can understand in Convict Conditioning.

Jail workout

The goal of Convict Conditioning is to help you work up to:

  1. AT LEAST one set of 5 one-arm pushups each side—with the ELITE goal of 100 sets each sid
  2. AT LEAST one set of 5 one-leg squats each side—with the ELITE goal of 2 sets of 50 each side
  3. AT LEAST one set of 1 one-arm pullups each side—with the ELITE goal of 2 sets of 6 each side
  4. AT LEAST one set of 5 hanging straight leg raises—with the ELITE goal of 2 sets of 30
  5. AT LEAST one set of 1 stand-to-stand bridges—with the ELITE goal of 2 sets of 30
  6. AT LEAST one set of 1 one-arm handstand pushups—with the ELITE goal of 1 set of 5

You definitely deserve major props if you’re able to pull off these exercises in real life.

Have any questions about the prison workout routine? Let me know in the comments below.

*** Note: No matter how much you want to, try not to bring beef jerky into a vegan restaurant. While it probably won’t land you in prison, it is highly frowned upon.

52 Comments - Leave Your Thoughts

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  1. There is so much you can do with just bodyweight, if you get creative.

    I pulled together a series of short videos of different mountain climber variations. Not only fun they just work.

    Now I’ve heard of most of the exercises, but one hand handstand pushups – WHAT! Have you tried doing one? I can do handstand pushups, almost do them freestanding, but can’t go to one hand.

    1. Hey Troy, nope can’t 1 hand handstand pushups yet haha. I’m slowly working more bodyweight stuff into my routine – trying to do a regular handstand push up first.

  2. It’s funny when you look at the really big dudes in the gym and they can do very little pushups/pullups or any other body weight moves. Real fitness needs to be functional, just like the moves you listed here. Nice!

  3. Keith,

    I’ve read Convict Conditioning and one of the things I like best is how it helps people of varying degrees of physical fitness work up to the hardest bodyweight exercises. The step-by-step workout plan is pretty brilliant, and it’s something I’ll be using to finally be able to do handstand pushups.

    Convict Conditioning is a great read and highly recommended.

    1. Good luck on the handstand push ups Robert. Those are definitely one of the most advanced bodyweight exercises out there.

  4. I might have LOL’d at the opening paragraph a little too much.
    I’m a huge fan of body weight exercises.
    Always use them as ‘finishing’ movements in my workouts to exhaust the muscles.
    They also a MUST for working out whilst travelling.

    1. Haha thanks Clint. Doing a 1-2 rounds of a bodyweight circuit is definitely a great way to finish off any workout.

  5. Amazing stuff but one thing I don’t understand is how many times do we do these exercises (reps) and what exercises do we do? Should I do all the upper body pressups in one day or divide them to different days?

    1. Well there are an infinite amount of combinations you can do. For example, you could do the exercises in a circuit fashion, alternating between upper and lower body exercises for 12-15 reps each.

  6. They ear everything they can get their hands on. A lot of Ramen noodles without the packet. Tuna, canned beef bread. Always some sort of Ramen noodle, packs and packs of Ramen noodles.

    Mexican Rountine is mandatory for CA inmates by Mexicans. Hardest workout 113 reps are mandaotry for all MExican american inmates (google Navy Seal Burpee for a very close version of the workout). I heard they have 2 weeks from being admitted to be able to do 113 in a row. There are variation on the last 13 of the 113 that make them harder.

    Funny thing about stress, they have more stress than the average person worring about everyone outside the walls(wifes/ kids, girlfriends cheating on them), getting stabbed getting raped (worse than paying bills &work)

    1. hard to say exactly, you could pick one exercise from each category(push up, pull up, squat, lunge, abs) and do them in a circuit fashion for 15-20 reps each and repeat the circuit.

        1. again depends. Because this is just your BW so it won’t be super hard on your body. I would think you can do this 5x per week.

  7. It is a great article, and its inspiring everything seems right, just letting you know prison is long term you can’t get arrested and get put into prison just like that you go jail first and if the crime is bad enough they get transferred to a prison.

  8. The idea of being ‘big and bad’ sounds like common sense and thinking that big arms are somehow indicative of a force to be reckoned with is appealing. However, next time you get a chance to glimpse a Navy SEAL or any of the elite unit guys (in real life, not the movies) take note of their build. Most are not physically imposing, at least as far as size, but I would stack them up against most anyone in a threat situation.

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