How To Speak Fitness: 55 Words And Phrases You Must Know
Every industry has it’s own lingo and terminology.
If you’ve spent a decent amount of time doing this whole fitness thing, you’ve probably picked up on a few new words.
For most guys who regularly lift, they speak fitness.
And it can get pretty complex. Luckily I broke a lot of it down for you.
So here’s the (very politically incorrect) guide on how to speak fitness which includes 55 common words and phrases.
1. “On that grind” – Basically, you workout. But you like to think working out is the equivalent of running a billion dollar business.
2. Before/after pics – Hey looks like you conveniently got some new bathroom lighting and an amazing tan. Cool…
3. Bowflex – Wait, Bowflex still exists?
4. Metabolism – The word you can’t define but use to describe everything.
5. “I lost 10 pounds in my first 2 weeks” – You lost 2 pounds of fat and 8 pounds of water.
6. Peer reviewed study – Something written by some smart science dudes that you don’t understand jack shit about but use it to back your beliefs up.
7. Glycemic index – What is this, 2007?
8. Mirin – I can only assume you’re 15 years old.
9. Bodybuilding.com – That website you used to visit every day in 2008.
10. Superfood – This fruit has a little more Vitamin C.
11. Minimalist workout – I only train 2x per week for 20 minutes and I’m better than you in every possible way. Oh and my dick is 3 inches bigger than yours too.
12. An “eat clean train dirty” shirt – You go to the gym and eat healthy in case no one could tell from you being in the gym already.
13. Green coffee bean extract – You’re a 47 year old housewife who watches Dr. Oz.
14. I’m “bout dat life” – You enjoy all aspects of fitness, working out, and dieting. And when I say “fitness” I mean lifting weights, exclusively. If you enjoy doing bodyweight exercises or yoga, you’re automatically disqualified from being “bout dat life.”
15. Sleeveless hoodies – You now own the most illogical piece of clothing ever invented.
16. Detox diet – Congrats, you just got scammed.
17. Chipotle – The unofficial restaurant for all guys who lift
18. Bulking – You gained a crap ton of weight and hope 10% of it is actual muscle.
19. Lean Bulking – You’re trying to only gain lean muscle but it takes too long and you end up just bulking instead.
20. Dieting – A 16-50 year old female who is trying to lose weight
21. Cutting – A 16-35 year old male who is trying to lose body fat
22. Planet Fitness – A gym that hardcore that every hardcore lifter love to shame even though it does help and encourage a small subset of the population get in shape.
23. Fitbit – A $70+ gadget that tracks how many steps you take. If only we had a cheaper alternative that did this. I’m going to invent one and call it a pedometer. #dontstealmyidea
24. Hardcore rap and heavy metal music – What you tell everyone you listen to while you workout but secretly listen to Katy Perry.
25. “I don’t do cardio” – Looking lean and muscular is all I care about but I can’t run a mile if my life depended on it.
26. The Big 3 – What you must do to be considered as someone who works out.
27. Bench Press – That exercise you do to impress a bunch of other guys you don’t know, who really don’t give a crap, and secretly fear will kill you
28. Deadlift – What no one knows how to do with perfect form.
29. Squat – It’s the ONLY way to grow your legs. “But what about…” Shut the fuck up, it’s the only way to get big legs. Don’t be a pussy and squat.
30. Shredz – We literally hired every single model, soft core porn star, and pretty much any girl with implants on Instagram to pose with our incredibly overpriced, sub-par supplements.
31. “She squats” – There’s a 99% chance I touched myself thinking about you.
32. Testosterone – That hormone in your body that apparently makes you more of a man but you have no idea what your levels are and you’re probably never going to get it measured.
33. Steroids – What some people choose to take to gain more muscle and what way too many people give a shit about.
34. Natty – Because arguing about whether someone takes steroids is what life is all about.
35. Half natty – A term used to describe someone who if 10x more ripped and muscular than you so you claim he’s on steroids but in reality you’re just a jealous little bitch.
36. Foam rolling -That thing you do but you’re not really sure if it’s even working.
37. Youtube fitness community – Where you go to argue with 12-50 year olds about whether someone is on steroids or not.
38. “I’m a certified personal trainer” – I paid $300 to pass a multiple choice test filled with misinformation and subjective views and now I’m qualified to teach anyone how to get a six pack.
39. Dad bod – That thing everyone talked about in mid-2015 but no one talks about anymore.
40. Alpha – What you’re automatically NOT if you use this word.
41. Beta – What you automatically are if you use this word.
42. Gainz -A term used to describe how much muscle you’ve gained (pun intended). Why people don’t just say “I gained muscle” is one of life’s greatest questions.
43. Gains – A spelling mistake
44. P90x – What you tried to do but couldn’t finish, but when you do somehow finish, you must tell every single person you know how it’s the best thing in the world.
45. “This could be us but…” – We’re a couple who likes to look at pictures of incredibly attractive couples in great shape and mull over why we’re such lazy bastards.
46. “What are you training today?” – The next thing you say after you see someone you know at the gym.
47. Clean eating – You eat healthy, nutritious, minimally processed foods. Totally cool, I respect that. But then you need to stick a label on it and turn it into a cult.
48. Cheat day – You binge eat to the point where you feel sick and want to throw up but it’s the healthy thing to do, because balance.
49. Cheat meal – You eat a sensibly sized meal of foods you enjoy and don’t stuff yourself till you’re sick. This guy…crazy mofo.
50. Multivitamin – Something you take that probably doesn’t do shit but you take it anyways because it makes you feel better about yourself.
51. “I’m going to bulk a little bit more” – Staying lean is too hard and my self-worth is tied to how much muscle mass I have.
52. Maintenance – What no one ever fucking does.
53. Big forearms – LOL you jerk off a lot
54. “I bench 225 for 5 reps” – I bench 225 for 5 quarter reps OR I bench 205-220 but tell people I bench 225
55. Intermittent fasting – I sometimes eat less meals during the day but call it intermittent fasting since it makes me feel cooler.
So yeah…hope this helps
I really hope this guide helps you guys navigate all this crazy fitness talk.
What words should be added to this guide? Let me know down in the comments.
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